On Human Nature

sige ikukwento ko muna siya sa inyo. itong prof. nato kasi, bakla... si badingerzi ay isang respetado at recommended na prof. dito sa UPLB.Isa siyang 5' 8" siguro na mga 80 kg (kasing bigat ko). di naman siya kaputian, in fact, negro at may warts na
siya dahil 50+ na siya at magreretire na. sa una di mo aakalaing bakla. kasi nung inintroduce niya sarili niya sa amin, oo nga medyo mukhang bakla magsalita dahil may accent, pero di mo na maiisip na bakla yon kasi nga formal english nga naman dapat. tapos naging carpenter
na rin daw siya somewhere, at balak niya daw pag magre-retire siya maging farmer nalang. o diba ok, mukhang lalake. nageenjoy nga ako pag nagtuturo si gago e, kasi mukha siyang frog.

Ok, the gruesome reality is...

nagsimula ito sa isang pinabasa niya na storya sa amin. Yung pasilyo 8. edi yon, binasa namin yung story. tapos nun, may mga pinasagot siyang mga questions sa amin regarding the selection. Edi ginalingan ko yung mga sagot ko sa assignment. tapos pasahan na ng mga assignments. tapos nacheck niya na yung mga papel.tapos bigla nalang nung isang klase nasurpresa nalang ako kilala niya na ako. edi natuwa naman ako, kasi may possibility na "ahh.. magiging mataas grade ko dito, kilala niya na ako e."

kasi sabi niya kasi dati. 'OK' daw ang mga insights ko. ewan ko ba. sinusulat ko lang naman kasi kung ano talaga yung gusto kong isulat e tapos nainlab yata siya sa mga insights ko, hence, sa akin na rin. waha

nagsimula ang aking confirmation dahil sa pinag recite niya ako tungkol sa isang poem na binasa namin na ang title ay "Three Translations of a Haiku".

I An old silent pond...
A frog jumps into the pond,
Splash! Silence again.

II Old dark sleepy pool...
Quick unexpected
Frog
Goes plop! WaterSplash!

III The ancient pond
A frog leaps in
The Sound of the Water.


ang sabi niya, "Mr. Santos, what do you think, Show your classmates your flashes of brilliance." Edi, nagulat ako diba? yung sagot ko naman, "Sir I think the frog was just at a tree, then it
accidentally fell". Eh yun yung gusto kong sagutin e. Eto na ... "Very good!!" sabi ni gayprof.

!!!!!!!! What the f***!!!! kahit sinong tanungin mo sa mga classmates ko nun, di sila sasagot ng katulad ng sinagot ko. MALI TALAGA SAGOT KO! so, this only means, either he's not listening to me or, he is not a he... which ultimately means one thing. now, to the finer points of his(?) gayness.

HE ONLY TEXTS HIS(?) MALE STUDENTS. To expound this concept more... after getting the contact numbers of his students through deviously letting us believe that the 3 X 5 index card we're passing to him that contains our bio info in it, he then starts to text his male students regarding their opinions on some of the topics that we discuss in his class. After that, not only does he ask about topics in class, he also asks 'us' to meet him in some food joint so he can "treat" 'us' to dinner. Then if you do not reply to those kinds of text messages, he suddenly
changes the dinner treat to a drinking fest. I quote, "All these other teachers are ganging up on me, I want to relieve all this stress!! Let's have an SMB"..

if you still don't reply to him, he then calls you.

you're shocked...

you don't like to answer your phone.

Instead he texts again... "Let's have our SMB later, when is your
free time."

you don't answer.

he suddenly stops for about 2 days of texting you.

Weekend comes.

He texts again (in the evening), "Let's have our drink now".

you're still scared, so you don't, you can't reply.

But to let the suffering pass. We make a stupid move.

We finally reply to him. "Sir, I'm sorry I can't really text you back because i don't have money to buy phone credit"

SHIT !!!!

He then, unexpectedly, passes P30 load to you!!

Now, there's no way out.

He texts you, "I want you to make a 10 page essay on 'Human Nature'"

eto pa, "You can use the computer in my house if you don't have one."

nabasa mo ba yon, "You can use the computer in my house if you don't have one."

days pass. the freak show still won't end.

you are now panicking because there's still 1 activity left for the subject and you don't want to let the fear overcome you and say to you, "Huwag ka nang pumasok makikita ka lang nung prof mong bakla".

So you still let the feeling "konti nalang matatapos na rin" get into you

Buti nalang discrete siya sa pagiging bakla niya kaya nakapagrelax naman kami kahit konti sa last day of classes sa subject niya.

He then reminds you of the 10 page essay.

you dont text gayprof but he calls, you start to panic again. you give your phone to your elder sister. ATE then answers it, you shout at her saying, "AYOKONG SAGUTIN". but it's too late. she already pressed the answer button, she then gives the phone back to you. you answer it, "Sir??".

Gay: "mr. francis santos. nacompute ko na grades mo ang baba mo kasi sa assignments mo kaya 2.0 lang. And I know better that you don't deserve that grade. tataas yon kapag ginawa mo yung 10 page essay on human nature."

you: "Sir ok na po sakin yung dos, wala po kasi talaga akong time gawin yun sir, sorry, busy rin po ako sa project ko sa isang com sci subject ko. sorry sir"

***pero wala talaga akong project nun tapos na. ok sir gusto ko mang tumaas ang grade ko pero ayoko pang mamatay. ang pilit niyo pa e sa bahay niyo pa ako gagawa ng essay na yun. wag na lang mas ok na dos ka lang pero buhay ka pa***

Gay: "Ayaw mo talaga? sayang naman."

you continue saying that your priority is your com sci project.

the call ends. phew...

you later receive a message "Just remember I have faith in your ability to write. you need not be self-effacing my friend. . . .blah blah " (nalimutan ko n ung sumunod)

meron pang "summer blooms springs eternal blah blah" bullshit na tinext sakin yung shet na yun pagka-alala ko

*pick up lines ba?? sinundan pa yun ng mga message na "i'll just see you around then... ". hanggang ngayon swerte ko di ko pa siya uli nakita.

paano ko nakuha classcard ko??? -> ninja moves

paano nga ba maeexplain ang human nature??